"Climate Change to End Spring Break, Scientists Say"
"Scientist say white kids and some kids of color (who aren't too colored to be kind of scary) will not be able to party their asses off in Cancun by 2020 due to coastal beach resorts being submerged. Scientists have had to ask the tough question: "won't someone think of the children (white meritocratic high achieving children, of course)?"
"Let's live on the planet as if we intend to stay."
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